Friday, February 8, 2013

News: Seahag Gets 30 Years For Moida

Said star witness Popeye, "She filled 'im fulla lead and slaughterized 'im! Uh guh guh guh guh." 

From the Miami Herald.


Keys ‘Seahag’ gets 30 years for killing man who refused to give her a beer

by Ryan McCarthy
Feb. 4, 2013

Former Conch Key resident Carolyn Dukeshire has the next 30 years to think about the can of Busch Light beer she never got from neighbor Martin Mazur.

That's the reason Dukeshire, 62, shot and killed Mazur, 64, last July 29 — she asked Mazur for a beer and he said no. That's when she shot him five times outside his Conch Key home.

Dukeshire — known by her friends and co-workers as the Seahag — pleaded guilty to second-degree murder Thursday, accepting an agreement with the Monroe state attorney's office for a maximum 30 years in prison.

A 17-year Keys resident, Dukeshire had no previous arrest history in Monroe County.
Star witness Popeye:
"She pulverized him to death!

According to a Monroe County Sheriff's Office report, just before the shooting, Dukeshire reportedly asked Mazur, for whom she had previously done some lobster-trap work: "Do you have a cold beer for me?" He reportedly replied, "I have absolutely nothing for you."


That's when Dukeshire shot Mazur five times.

Deputy Michael Claudy's report says "it seems apparent" Mazur was attempting to flee from the gunfire but collapsed near a tiki bar in his backyard.

Mazur's reported business partner, Casey Whippo, 30, witnessed the shooting and told police he struggled with Dukeshire for the gun.

Sheriff's office divers recovered the small-caliber weapon the next day in a canal behind the house. 


Beyonce's Backfired-Request-Turned-Internet-Meme Of The Day

Long story short, after some "unflattering" photos of Beyonce from her Super Bowl performance turned up on a Buzzfeed post, her publicist wrote and politely asked the website to remove them--which, of course, Buzzfeed didn't do, this being the internet and all, and instead the whole thing turned into a hilarious Photoshop meme.

Two of the original pics:


Hilarity ensues:







LOOK AT ME GO!

ERMAGERD! GERSBERMS!

I MUST BREAK YOU






Why not Zoidberg?


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