Friday, June 22, 2012

Genuises Of The Day: Smokin' at The PD

I bet they get kicked out of Mensa for this. From Chris C. and WBAL.

Men caught smoking pot at Ocean City police headquarters


OCEAN CITY, MD: Ocean City police said they caught three men smoking pot in the parking lot of their headquarters.

Officers were in the parking lot of the Public Safety Building in the process of their shift change at about 8 a.m. on Tuesday when they noticed a black Hyundai with the windows down and three men in and around the vehicle.

As officers passed the men, all from Cranberry, Pa., they said they noticed a strong odor of marijuana coming from the vehicle.

Officers approached the three men, identified as 19-year-olds Vance Austin Embry, Wayne Michael Jelinek and Julian Dominick Jordano, and ordered them to exit the vehicle.

During a vehicle search, officers said several bags of marijuana, paraphernalia and dextroamphetamine -- a schedule I controlled dangerous substance -- were discovered.

Embry was charged with possession of marijuana and three counts of possession of paraphernalia. Jelinek and Jordano were charged with possession of a dextroamphetamine.

After an initial appearance by an Ocean City District Court Commissioner, all three men were released on their own personal recognizance.

The 12 Best Opening Movie Lines Of All Time

At least according to Flavorwire. Here are the lines. I'll let you figure out the movies.

1. “As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster.”

2. “I was 12 going on 13 the first time I saw a dead human being.”

3. “What came first, the music or the misery?”

4. “Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family, Choose a fucking big television. Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed-interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suit on hire purchased in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sittin’ on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rottin’ away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats that you’ve spawned to replace yourself. Choose a future. Choose life… But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose somethin’ else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you’ve got heroin?”

5. “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to violence, the word and the act.”

6. “Rosebud… “

7. “Greetings, my friends! We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives.”

8. “… Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.”

9. “‘Chapter One. He adored New York City. He idolized it all out of proportion.’ Uh, no, make that: ‘He-he… romanticized it all out of proportion. Now… to him… no matter what the season was, this was still a town that existed in black and white and pulsated to the great tunes of George Gershwin.’ Ahhh, now let me start this over… “

10. “Who are you?”
“I am Death.”

11. “People are always asking me if I know Tyler Durden… “

12. “There’s a hundred-thousand streets in this city. You don’t need to know the route. You give me a time and a place, I give you a five minute window. Anything happens in that five minutes and I’m yours. No matter what. Anything happens a minute either side of that and you’re on your own. Do you understand?”



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