Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Classic Vid Of The Day: Crazy Ass Goose

Two things come to mind as I watch this video:

1) Gabby needs to turn in her dog card. Shameful.

2) Her owner needs to turn in his man card. I'm all for being humane, but at the :47 mark, I'm sending that goose to Waterfowl Hell with one swift wring of that long neck.

Geniuses Of The Day

From The Smoking Gun.

Teen Thieves Snorted Cremated Remains

JANUARY 19--Mistaking the cremated remains of a man and two dogs for powdered drugs, a quintet of teenage burglars snorted the ashes after a break-in last month at a Florida residence, according to police.

That startling disclosure is contained in a Marion County Sheriff’s Office report, in which one of the arrestees tells deputies that the ashes “had been taken because the suspects mistook it for either cocaine or heroin.”

At some point, however, the alleged burglars determined that the powdered substances were not drugs, but that they had stolen “the remains from the dogs and the victims father.”

This realization apparently came after news reports about the December 15 burglary of Holli Tencza’s home mentioned that intruders took her father’s ashes from a closet, while the remains of her two Great Danes were removed from a shelf in her bedroom. A sheriff’s report on the burglary listed electronics and jewelry taken during the theft, and noted that, “Also taken from her bedroom were her father’s ashes and those of her two dogs.”

The sheriff’s source reported that there was a “possibility” that the purloined ashes were in the attic of Waldo Soroa, 19, one of the suspects charged with the burglary.

Along with Soroa (who is pictured in the above mug shot), cops arrested Jose Diaz Marrero, 19; Matrix Andaluz, 18; and two 17-year-olds on an assortment of criminal charges.

Vid Of The Day: It's A Bird, It's A Plane, It's...

A political statement.

From BLong.

Embarrassing Human Billboards Of The Day

Surely there are easier ways to make $7.50 an hour.

I never realized the Statue Of Liberty was a black man. With a mustache.

The elf shoes make it.

Hopefully they make wax sheets, too.

"Eat me!"

Lame lame

With liberty and biscuits for all.

What happens when he has to pee?

Yeah, you look just like Fred. Especially the jeans and the hat.

This one I like. Wish I could see the front.

Desperate times...

Yeah, the soft drink is the best thing on the Quizno's menu.

They win.

Clever, but I bet his neck hurts.

These I especially love. File under Law, Order and Creative Judges.

The flowers make me think she's sincere.

Looks 'Shopped but I hope it's not.

250K? They must have a lot of crime in Harris County.

And this Coke.

Kohl's has headphones?


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