Sunday, June 17, 2007

Worst Celebrity Dads

The top 10 worst celebrity dads, from Maxim magazine.

10. David Hass--burp--selhoff

The Hoff, he like the drinky. What kind of jackass asks his kid to videotape him the next time he gets snockered?

9. Rick Hilton

Real nice job on Paris, guy. She's only a spoiled, brain-dead, exhibitionistic racist druggy jailbird. Did she call you crying from the pokey today?

8. Ozzy Osbourne

Two kids, two rehab bills. I guess those "just say no" messages just aren't that credible coming from a guy who said he once took acid every day for a full year.

7. Father Oliver O'Grady

While not technically a father, this scumbag should be #1 on the list. Abused so many children (25), they made a movie about him ("Deliver Us From Evil"). Here's hoping he'll be delivered to a special place in Hell for people who use religion to take advantage of others.

6. Michael Lohan

See Rick Hilton.

And he looks like such a nice guy.

5. Alec Baldwin

Phone fan. I bet his phone doesn't ring at all this Father's Day.

4. Joe Simpson

We're allowed to talk about Jessica's funbags. You aren't. Creep.

3. Darth Vader

Absentee father. Doesn't even meet his son until the kid is grown, and what's the first thing he does? Lops off the boy's hand! Nice.

2. Scott Peterson

Not technically a father, because he murdered his son in utero. Jeez, fucko, at least try it before you hate it. Not to be hateful, but I hope this oxygen- thief's rectum is the busiest corridor at San Quentin.

1. Michael Jackson

Kiddie-fiddler who dangled his own child out a hotel window. You're bad all right, Mikey. Really really bad.


Happy Father's Day to all the great dads among my readers.... Don, Tom K, Jim T, Greg, Rob, Kevin, James, Seth, Terry, Sean, BW, Brad, David W, David D, Buff, Willie, Wayne, Pete, Burt, Michael, TKS and Q.

You're still big mothers in my book.


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